Ghanaian-American filmmaker Leila Djansi has triggered a conversation about women’s choices in relationships, criticizing what she describes as a troubling pattern of sacrificing personal growth and independence for love.
The award-winning filmmaker shared her frustration after losing her nanny because the woman’s boyfriend demanded she quit her job and return home. Leila used the incident to highlight how often women abandon opportunities and stability at the command of their partners.
“Why on earth do some women make decisions based on their boyfriend? We lost a nanny yesterday because her boyfriend wanted her back home. I keep seeing this.
“A man snaps his fingers and some women throw away work, income, opportunity, stability. What is it? Security? Love? Or some body part driving you crazy?” she wrote in a social media post sighted by MyNewsGh.
She went on to list what she believes are the top three things many women wrongly prioritize above their own development: “My boyfriend, my husband, my child.
The three primary things women place above income, advancement, wellbeing, independence and personal growth.”
According to Leila, the irony is that these same people, men and children included, often look out for their own interests first.
“Any man who demands that you throw away something that serves you just to please him is not in love with you.
“A man who does not care about what you want does not care about you. He’s using you to keep himself comfortable. He will replace you in a second,” she said.
Leila advised women to recognize manipulation when it comes disguised as love. Using her signature blend of wit and honesty, she added, “I know you don’t want to hear it, because that one thing he does sends you straight to the international space station. Madam, come back to earth and plant your feet on higher ground.”
The filmmaker concluded by urging women to cultivate self-worth before seeking validation from others.
“Women are conditioned to invest in others who are not taught to invest back equally. That is the tragedy. Your tragedy as a woman. Because if those things are ever taken away from you, you will be empty. Zero. Nothing. Be smart. Fill yourself up with something valuable FIRST before you bend over.”
